Sunday morning...

This has actually been a good weekend.  I know it's because Wayne hasn't had his chemo treatments in two weeks, so that's hanging over our heads, but it's nice to see him feeling so good again.  He's been able to eat and is not running to the bathroom every ten minutes.  He only took one long nap yesterday instead of being completely exhausted all day.  It's been nice.  Really nice.  I'm trying not to think about microscopic cancer cells floating around his body and laughing, "Hahaha...you took two weeks off from chemo and that's all the time we needed to find a nice spot to set up a new camp!"

How long do they need?  I think about this a lot.  Throat cancer is not usually caught in the early stages because we all tend to dismiss the symptoms as something else.  I know we did.  All last winter, I remember him complaining of a scratchy throat or thinking he was coming down with a cold or maybe his allergies were acting up.  It wasn't every day.  Just once in a while, but looking back, it was a little too often.  I remember each time thinking, "Oh crap.  If he's sick, I'm gonna get sick too."  But I didn't.  He didn't really get sick either.  He would just think he was coming down with something for a few days and then it would go away.  Then in April the lymph nodes in his neck swelled up.  We dismissed this too, until it didn't go away for a month.  In May, he went to his regular doctor and got some antibiotics for an "infection."  By June, the lymph nodes stayed swollen, so the doctor sent him to an ENT for another round of stronger antibiotics.  There was no change, so a needle biopsy was done the day before we left for our cruise.  The doctor wasn't concerned and suggested we go enjoy ourselves.  I'm so glad we did, because it was nice to have that last vacation before facing the "C-word."  The needle biopsy came back clear though, so the ENT wanted to do a surgical biopsy.  This was July.  The biopsy showed squamous cell carcinoma.  A PET scan confirmed that it was stage 3.

I think about this often.  Should we have done something sooner?  Could we have?  How many scratchy throats have I had in my lifetime that were just a cold or mouth breathing or "somethin' bloomin'"?  How do we know when to dismiss something as nothing or take it seriously?

Too much to ponder on a Sunday morning...