One of my friends from work was telling me today how she and her husband are going to couple's therapy. Obviously, I don't know all the ins and outs of any relationship, but her hubby seems like a good guy, and mostly she seems to like him. Anyway, she was saying today that she was bored. The thrill of the chase was gone. She likes the excitement of a new relationship, and learning a new person.
I think she's nuts.
Having to get a new husband is one more thing that terrifies me about Wayne having cancer. Besides loving him, I like my husband. I'm used to him. We get along well. We have stupid jokes we both laugh at. He doesn't make me go to weird restaurants. He knows what I like and don't like. We have worked out most of the really difficult things that pop up in the early years of any relationship, and we're still together. I joke that I have him trained the way I want him. If he dies, I'd either have to start again with someone else or resign myself to being alone at 43.
Yeah, after 13 years, our marriage is not always roses and fireworks, but I'm okay with that. I do not want to date again. I don't want to have to learn new weird quirks. I don't want to get used to new noises during the night. I don't want to have to hammer out the division of household chores. I don't want to talk about "money." I don't want to get to know new in-laws or step-kids. I don't want to wash some stranger's socks or underwear. I don't want to teach a new man what I like in bed. I don't want to get naked in front of someone new! I don't want to have to explain my kinks or what I like and don't like.
None of this sounds like fun to me. It does not sound exciting or thrilling. It just sounds like too much work, and I'd much prefer to stick with what I have.
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